Eff You, Zombies!
by Arcadia Ryter
Summary: Largo goes missing, and the other characters must team up to find him before he finds RentAZilla again. That or beer machines...
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: It all belongs to Fred (Gallagher, not Krueger.) Except the story. Well, most of it.

"Hey, Erika." Piro said as Hayasaka Erika came into the Megagamers store, "Have you seen Largo lately?"

"No. Is there something wrong?" She asked. She smiled inwardly. Piro was dressed like a pink teddy bear. She loved making him cosplay animals.

"Well, it's just he's been gone a really long time and," he hesitated, fiddling with one pink bear ear, "he may be getting in trouble again."

"You want me to look for him?" Erika asked. She and Largo have been going out for some time by now, and Erika now got generally worried when no one knew where Largo was. Mostly for the reason that when he was gone, half of Tokyo would be destroyed by maniac Sony and Sega workers with large guns, a Rent-A-Zilla, a ninja, or a mob of undead zombies.

"No, I'll look for him." Piro said taking off the teddy bear helmet. "Can you watch the store?"

"Like I always do when you chase Largo around Tokyo?" Piro nodded. "Sure. Go get him."

"Thanks, Erika!" Piro said as he walked out of the store.

Erika leaned against the counter, the quiet deafening. She knew by what the ninja said, that it would be twenty-five minutes before the next fanboy walked in asking to buy something, then get her autograph. She sighed. She hoped Largo came back soon.

"Now, if I were Largo," Piro muttered to himself, "where would I be?"

"...Beer machines."

Author notes: Short intro, then Largo sh4ll b3 t3h p4wnz0r 0v3r t3h z0mb13s.


	2. Chapter 2

"BWAHAHAHA!" Largo shouted as another zombie's head flew away after another l33t hit by his baseball bat. He had been tired of constantly waiting for the attacks; this time, he was on the offensive. He had found their headquarters, some undead music store, and was now going about reducing their numbers. One by one, just like all of his foes before, like the Sparklebunny and the 3ggpl4n7 0f 73rr0r, they fell. He had not taken much damage, and he doubted he would get much more before his tactical retreat. He had nearly taken out one hundred, his goal, and after that, he would let them suffer their loses without him.

"Rawrawr!?" _What the hell's going on!?_ A zombie commander asked, coming out of the base.

"RAWAR!" _It's the scary one with the muffin cart again!_ A private said, scared out of his undead mind.

"RAWG!" _Dammit!_

"Ninety-seven..." Largo bashed another one away.

"Ninety-eight..." Over the shoulder club.

"Ninety-nine..." One had tripped in front of him. He laid some serious b347d0wn on the helpless undead.

"0n3-- HUH!?" The entire zombie army had backed away, and was now running for their hole. Except for one lone figure, walking slowly towards him.

He prepared himself. He knew that particular 4c13n7 3v1l anywhere. The Zombie Queen, the Mgkgrl gone astray. He hadn't any idea that this one would be here. He would've planned to drink a little more b33r before coming. Ate a few Oaty-O's... They might be his last. He disboarded from his l33t muffin machine to face her down.

"Largo-san..." Miho said slowly. She always had this sad look in her eyes, to take others by surprise, because Zombies haven't got emotions. Or eyes. He knew better than to look straight into the beast's eyes.

"Why do you hate zombies so much?" Miho asked. She was still approaching, getting far too close for a proper stand-off. She was nearly within arm's reach now.

"They are t3h 3v1l. Just like j00." He held his baseball bat aloft.

Miho touched his baseball bat. Suddenly, Largo's arm lowered without him understanding why. And he could not raise it back up. At all.

"Wh4t 3v1l 15 7h15!?" Largo shouted. "Wh47 cur53--?"

"What do you mean, curse?" Miho smiled, drawing nearer. "I did nothing to you. You did it yourself."

"Little furry D00d!"

Boo popped up over his shoulder. "Squee?"

"Get t3h backup, now! Get anyone!"

Boo nodded and, followed by a quick "Squee-squee" he took off.

Largo grimly thought about his rapidly ceasing future, and hoped the little D00d could bring back some real back-up.


End file.
